


El Tango De Sal

by SummerBerrySpaceman



Category: Sally Face (Video Games)
Genre: Abuse, Alcohol Abuse, Angst, Anxiety Attacks, Bullying, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Nightmares, Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-09
Updated: 2020-02-07
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:28:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 12,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22180300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SummerBerrySpaceman/pseuds/SummerBerrySpaceman
Summary: Sal likes LarryLarry likes SalTravis likes SalSal likes TravisHe didn't mean to get caught up in all of this, but now it feels as if he's started a war.AU where: they're high school seniors, no cult/ghost activity, Henry and Lisa don't get togetherWill have triggering content such as self-harm and suicide! I will ALWAYS tag before a chapter though! Stay safe <3
Relationships: Sal Fisher/Larry Johnson, Sal Fisher/Travis Phelps
Comments: 23
Kudos: 57





	1. Trouble

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for:  
> -Anxiety attacks  
> -Bullying

**_Trouble - Cage the Elephant_ ** **_  
_ ** \-----------------------------------------

It was a normal day to Sal -- well, as normal as you can get in Nockfell. He sighed as he stood, going to his wardrobe and dressing in a black sweater with some matching black, ripped jeans. He slid on some red converse to top it off, deciding to put his hair up in a ponytail for today. Mix it up a little, he thought with a small chuckle to himself. He slid his prosthetic on afterwards, clicking the straps in the back. He picked up his phone, already seeing a text from Larry, telling him that he was waiting downstairs to walk with him.

He smiled, checking in his dad’s room to see him passed out. The stench of alcohol was strong and he rolled his eyes, going out and to the elevator. He pressed the button, leaning against his backpack as he waited. After what seemed like an eternity, he stepped out of the elevator and smiled when he spotted his friend outside the doors.

He pushed the doors open, greeting Larry with a yawn. Larry laughed, “not much sleep last night, little dude?” he asked.

Sal shrugged, not wanting to admit that he had another nightmare and didn’t call Larry. “A little. Forgot my sleeping meds. No biggie, I’ll just be sure to take them tonight.” he said, waving him off. Larry sighed a little, “How many nights is it gonna take to make you remember?” he asked softly, shaking his head.

Sal bumped his shoulder against him, “Till I get a memory longer than that of a pigeon.” he laughed. It got a chuckle out of Larry, which made Sal happy. He didn’t like Larry being all serious -- it just made him nervous for some reason.

They chatted as they finally got to the school, and Sal sighed, “guess this is where we part Larbear. See you second period.” he said. They waved to each other as Sal went to his locker, getting his books. He rolled his eyes as he saw a familiar purple sweater walk over to him.

“Hey, fag! You thought you could get away from me?! Where's your little guard dog?" He asked. Sal simply sighed, "Travis, it's too early for this shit." He muttered.

Travis growled in frustration, shoving him down hard. Sal winced a bit, looking up just in time for his cheek to meet Travis's fist, yelping in surprise. Travis simply smirked, "there's more where that came from, you freak. Just wait." He warned before walking to his own class, shooting Sal one last glare before disappearing into the classroom.

Sal shook his head, picking up his books and hurrying to his class, barely making it in time as the bell rang. He went to his seat in the back, getting his book and notebook out before leaning back, stretching and yawning before looking forward, trying his best to pay attention in this class.

Despite his best efforts, he felt himself nod off, his head on the desk.

~•••~

_ It was storming, mud under his feet. Where was he? Sal looked around, confused and disoriented. He started walking forward, the wind from the storm threatening to blow him back. He covered his face with his hands, his mask trying to tug free. It was in vain, the clasps giving way and his hands too slick to hold onto it. He gasped, covering his scarred face and looking back to find the prosthetic. It was gone, disappearing in the dark. _

_ He turned to keep going, but bumped into Larry. He looked up at him, hoping that he’d help him find the mask, but finding only a dark expression on Larry’s face. _

_ “No wonder you wear a mask. You’re fucking hideous.” he spat, shaking his head. Sal took a step back, covering his face as much as he could, “L-Larry, I… I thought you’d--” _

_ “I’d what? Accept that you look like that? Are you a fucking idiot?” he snapped, leaning and shoving Sal down into the mud. The mud started inching up Sal’s arms, like hands, as Sal fought against it. _

_ As he fought, Larry leaned down. “No one will ever love you, you monster.” he snapped, pushing his back into the mud and pinning him in place. The mud continued to climb up his body, eventually making it to his face. As it started covering his nose and mouth, he pleaded with Larry to let him up, but Larry’s face was set in stone, unfeeling. Sal felt tears falling, then felt his breath taken from him as the mud slid into his mouth and nostrils. _

He sat up so fast that he fell backwards in his chair, grasping his throat as he gasped for air, his chest tight. He looked around, trying to remember where he was. School, English class. He looked around at all the eyes that were on him, standing up quickly and ignoring the teacher as he ran out of the room, to the bathroom.

He went to the biggest stall, slamming the door shut and locking it, going to the wall and sitting against it, pulling his knees against his chest as he tried to slow his breathing. It only made it worse as he slid his hand up to take down his ponytail, grabbing fistfuls of his blue hair and yanking. It stung and hurt, but it was the only thing he knew that would ground him. He was vaguely aware of how numb his arms were, and how he was sobbing now, but he couldn’t find it in him to calm down.

He heard the door open, sliding one of his hands under his mask to cover his mouth to stifle the sound of his crying. A knock came at the door and he shook his head, staying quiet.

"Come on, freak, I know it's you in there! Open the door! It'll be worse if I have to get it open!" Travis yelled from the other side. Sal shakily stood, going to the door and opening it.

"Can we fucking not Travis?!" He said through panicked breaths. "I'm really n-not in the mood for your shit!" He snapped, earning him a punch to the jaw. He stumbled back, holding the spot as he just let himself fall back against the wall,the crying and breathing worsening.

Travis looked at him, frowning. He felt… sympathetic? Was that the word? Why did he feel bad for the idiot?! He just looked so distraught, and for once, it wasn't because of him. Should he get someone or..?

Travis took a step back, then looked back as the door to the bathroom opened, Larry stepping in. Travis felt a bit relieved that he wouldn't have to think about Sal anymore as he pushed past, going out.

Larry glared at him, but turned his attention to Sal, his brown eyes widening. He ran to Sal's side, crouching.

"What the fuck did Travis do?! Sal, hey…" he tried to shake his shoulder, but Sal reeled away, scooting away from him as far as he could. He'd never admit it, but it hurt Larry's feelings.

"Sally Face, what happened? What's wrong?" He asked quietly. Sal shook his head, yanking at his hair again. "St-Stop acting like yo-you care!" He yelled, hiccuping from the sobs.

Larry blinked, "Sal-- Sal, stop pulling your hair dude..." he said, reaching and taking his hands instead. Sal didn't pull away this time, too focused on trying to squeeze in breaths.

Larry just sat with him, letting the attack work its way out. He knew how Sal could get with his anxiety, and he was always content with just being with him until it passed.

Once he was breathing fine again, Sal sniffed, "Lar… I-I'm sorry, I-I didn't mean… what I said…" he said slowly. Larry offered a smile, "I know Sally Face…" he reassured him, offering his arms for a hug.

Sal crawled to him, accepting the hug and curling up to him. "Travis… he only hit me once. He seemed a bit freaked about what was going on. So… don't mess with him, ok?" He asked. As much as he didn't like Travis very much, he knew the kid had to have a rough home and didn't want to add to that stress.

Larry sighed, "One too many times…" he muttered, but groaned at Sal's glare, "fine! I won't mess with him… can you at least tell me what upset you so much?" He asked. Sal sighed, considering for a second.

"I-It was just a nightmare… fell asleep in class. I don't feel up to explaining the details though…" he murmured. He didn't want to relive it all again, not this soon at least. Larry simply nodded, looking up as the bell rang.

“Hey… feel up to walking? Need to go to the nurse?” he asked. Sal shook his head, “I-I’ll be fine… just a bit shaky.” he said, slowly standing and tying his hair back up into a ponytail, still stinging from where he’d pulled it. “I need to go get my stuff… meet you in science?” he asked.

Larry felt a little reluctant to leave him, but he nodded and gave a thumbs-up, “see ya in science, lil dude.” he said, patting Sal’s head gently before turning and going out. Sal watched, wiping the remnants of stray tears from under his mask. He was so lucky he had someone like Larry, and he hoped nothing would ever mess that up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I hope you enjoyed the first chapter. I know my writing style is a tad boring, but I hope you liked it nevertheless! <3


	2. Under Your Scars

**_Under Your Scars - Godsmack ** _  
\------------------------------------------_**_**

____

____

********

********

Lunchtime had rolled around quickly, and Sal was grateful. He needed a break after trying to pay attention in his classes, still feeling quite off from the nightmare earlier.

The cafeteria was bustling with people, and Sal grabbed his tray and headed to his table quickly, trying not to brush against anyone. His touch sensitivity was driving him insane today -- even the feeling of his sweater against his skin was making his brain go haywire.

He sat down at his usual table, the rest of the crew was already sitting and talking amongst themselves. Once he sat, Larry turned to give him a gap-toothed smile.God, Sal loved that smile. It always made him feel better.

“Hey Sally Face!” he said, turning the rest of his body to face him. “Are you feeling any better? You seemed pretty spacey in class…” he said with concern. Larry could tell his friend wasn’t feeling up to par today, though he didn’t expect him to after the bathroom incident.

Sal thought about just saying he was fine, but he couldn’t even fake it today. He shook his head, “Not really… Everything’s too loud, and…. Just feeling overwhelmed…” he sighed, massaging his temple. Larry nodded in understanding, then leaned forward a bit, “how about skipping? We could just hang out in my room, or the treehouse. Complete quiet, just us.” he suggested. Larry knew how Sal’s anxiety could be, especially since he admitted he didn’t take his medication last night. He wagered he didn’t take them this morning, either.

Sal pushed the food around his tray as he thought, then shrugged, “Yeah… anything’s better than here…” he said, nodding. Larry nodded, then motioned to his tray. Sal made a face under his mask and shook his head, deciding he definitely didn’t want any of the mush that was on his tray.

They both stood and Larry leaned to Todd, quietly explaining the situation without too many details. Todd gave a nod, “Hope you feel better, Sal.” he said with a small wave as Sal went to toss his tray, waiting for Larry before they slid out of the cafeteria and down the halls, finally out the front doors.

The fresh air helped clear Sal’s head a bit, but he still felt wound up. He didn’t like skipping school very often, but he couldn’t deal with it today. He’d already felt another panic attack coming on if he’d had to go to math class. He already didn’t understand half of what was going on in that chapter, and he definitely wouldn’t have understood it today.

The walk to the apartments was quiet, Larry didn’t want to disturb the silence. Sal seemed to appreciate it, keeping his eyes on the ground. He only looked up once they got to the apartments, following Larry inside to the elevator. The music was quiet, thankfully, and they made their way to Larry’s room once the elevator was down.

Once inside, Sal tossed his bag on the ground, sitting on one of the bean bag chairs, letting out a long breath. He watched as Larry set his stuff down and stretched, “Wanna stay here or head to the treehouse?” he asked, looking at Sal.

Sal thought for a moment. While the fresh air had been nice, it was chilly outside. “Here is fine.” he said after considering. Larry nodded, “In that case, I’m just gonna paint, alright? Like I said, all quiet.” he smiled, grabbing some paint.

Sal nodded, leaning back and closing his eyes. His mask felt uncomfortable, suffocating almost, but after the nightmare he was apprehensive to show Larry his face. He’d hid it for years now, and he was sure that Larry had seen a peek or two, but never the full damage. He wondered if his nightmare was accurate, but there would only be one way to find out.

He sat up a bit more, looking at Larry, “Hey… Lar?” he asked quietly. Larry looked at him, tilting his head in question. Sal took a deep breath, “Even if my face were… absolutely horrifying, you’d still be my friend… right?” he asked quietly, playing with the bottom of his sweater nervously.

Larry chuckled quietly, “What a weird question. Of course I would, Sally Face.” he said, setting his painting supplies down. “Looks don’t matter. Plus I doubt it’s horrifying. Probably looks cool as hell.” he said with a grin.

Sal felt his cheeks heat up as he hesitated, then reached around and unclipped the clasps on his mask. He held it in place for a moment before slowly lowering it, looking up at Larry. It was easier to breathe in reality, but in his mind it felt as if a huge weight was on his chest. He just hoped what Larry said had been true.

Larry was a bit shocked at the action, looking over his features, then nodded. “Yep. Just as I thought,” he said, then grinned, “badass as fuck.”

Sal blinked, then smiled brightly. Larry didn’t hate him. It was the opposite. It felt like a huge breath of relief, and his anxiety seemed to dissolve immediately. It felt like all the tension that had settled in throughout the day had just disappeared.

Larry still liked him. He wasn’t going to leave him. That’s all he needed to know.

~•••~

Once he needed to head home, Larry walked with him to the elevator. He held his mask in his hand, feeling a bit more comfortable with it off now. He felt normal for once, thanks to Larry. He hadn’t stared, hadn’t made anymore comments. Sal really appreciated Larry, even more so after today.

He turned and gave him a smile once he was in the elevator, “I’ll see ya around, Larry Face.” he said, pressing the button for his floor. Larry glanced back for a moment, then leaned and pressed his lips against Sal’s scarred cheek, leaning back after with a soft smile.

“See ya around, Sally Face.” he said quietly as the elevator doors closed. It left a stunned Sal inside, his cheeks flushing brightly as he touched his cheek where Larry had kissed. He felt a smile creep onto his lips as he clipped his mask back on.

Maybe Larry felt the same way he did. He wouldn’t push it, but the idea itself was magical to Sal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you like this chapter <3


	3. For The Damaged

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for:  
> -Abuse  
> -Alcohol

**_For The Damaged - Blonde Redhead_**  
\-----------------------------------------------------

The next day, the two boys didn’t talk about it, but Sal could feel that Larry seemed happier than usual. It made Sal himself feel happier as well, feeling more butterflies around Larry now with the possibility that he may like him back. He could at least hope.

The school day went by easily since Sal wasn’t nearly as stressed as the day before. He hadn’t even seen Travis around. Was he home sick today? He wasn’t really concerned, since he was enjoying a day without the constant bullying he put him through.

Lunch was nice, being able to talk to everyone. They could tell he felt much better, and they all felt relieved, especially Larry. After Sal had finished his food, he stood.

“I’m going to the bathroom before the bell rings.” he announced, taking his tray and tossing it before heading to the bathroom. He didn’t really need to go, but he liked the solace for the small bit before class. He didn’t really need it today, but it was so routine at this point that he did it anyways.

When he entered, he heard sniffling in one of the stalls. At first he didn’t pay any attention, but one glance at the stall and he could recognize the shoes and shorts of Travis. He tilted his head, and despite his better judgement, he went to the door and knocked.

“Are you fuckin’ stupid? Obviously this one’s taken!” a watery voice came from inside. Sal sighed, “Travis? Are you ok?” he asked quietly. There was a beat of silence, then another sniffle.

“Leave me alone…” came the voice, quieter and more sad than Sal expected. Sure, Travis had picked on him for as long as they’d known each other, but Sal also knew something had to be going on at home. He had seen the bruises littering him, and knew it wasn’t just from school fights.

Sal sighed, leaning on the wall. “I’m not moving from here until you talk to me.” he said, “I don’t care if I miss classes. You have to come out sooner or later.” he added. He planned to stick by his word, too. He didn’t mind lending an ear -- it wasn’t like Travis had friends to talk to, really. He knew how it was not to have anyone to talk to when you needed it.

After a while of silence, Travis finally spoke. “My fucking dad is the worst…” he muttered. “He’s always hurting me… for everything. Small things, big things…. Everything.” he said, the tears dripping down his face again. “I’m so fucking sick of it… I sleep in my truck half the time because he kicks me out when he’s REALLY mad…” he added after a moment.

Sal listened, sad that his suspicions were right. He’d just hoped that he got into fights outside of school or something. Travis rambled on for a while, even after the bell rang, about everything through his tears. Sal didn’t offer any commentary, just slid to sit on the ground as he soaked it all in.

After he was done, Travis sighed. “Sorry, that was a lot of info…” he murmured. Sal shook his head, “No… it’s better to get it all out, dude. Not good to hold shit in.” he said, then thought for a moment.

“Um… mine’s not as bad, but my dad gets drunk and hits me, too…” he said, tucking a piece of hair behind his ear. “I’m not trying to overshadow you. Trying to show that I relate to you…” he added quickly. “And show that I like, sorta get it…” he paused. “And that you can talk to me about it. I’m not gonna tell a soul. So long as you don’t tell anyone about mine either.”

Travis listened, then stood and unlocked the door, sighing as he opened it. “I didn’t know. I probably made your life hell…” he muttered. Sal shrugged, standing. “It’s fine. Not like you knew.” he said. 

He thought, then looked at him, “Hey, you know… we can put the bullying shit behind us. You seem like you need some friends.” he started. Travis blinked, “You’re not suggesting I join your clique? They definitely hate me…” he said.

Sal shook his head, “Sure they’ll be all weird and defensive at first, but I think if you show them your true colors, they’ll warm up to you…” he smiled a little. “And if it doesn’t work out with them, at the very least I’ll be your friend…” he said.

Travis thought, then nodded, “Alright… I’ll give it a chance.” he said. Sal nodded, “Great. I’ll see you tomorrow then?” he asked, “Gotta go grab my bag from the cafeteria and all…” he chuckled to himself. Larry probably grabbed it since they had the next class together, but he was going to check regardless.

Travis nodded, “Yeah, uh… tomorrow.” he said. Sal nodded, waving as he left. Only after he was gone did he realize exactly what he was doing. He’d have to talk to everyone, really work to let Travis into the group. He was sure he could do it, though.

~•••~

It took a few weeks, but eventually after many apologies and a lot of snarky comments, they finally started accepting him into the group. It made Sal happy, and Travis even more happy. Sal and Travis even hung out after school some days. Sal could tell that he was a lot happier than before, and even on his bad days, he still leaned on the group to help him through it.

Everything was going great… so why was Sal still feeling so empty, still?

He figured it was stupid of him to think that his mental illness would just… disappear with a new friend, but he could hope, right? Of course every time Sal hoped, it was crushed. So why bother?

After a particularly bad night with his dad that left him with a black eye, he sat in his room. He expected to cry, to feel bad, but he just felt numb. He thought about calling Larry, but he just didn’t feel up to it. He didn’t want to bog him down with his problems.

His mind wandered, then finally landed on the thought: _what did his father see in alcohol?_ Before he knew it, he was going to the kitchen, crouching in front of the fridge. He didn’t want any beer, he just wanted what would get him drunk the fastest.

He eventually found one of the two vodka bottles tucked into the back. He was sure his dad wouldn’t notice, since he was always so out of it. He picked it up, making his way back to his room quickly, closing and locking the door. He didn’t need his father coming in on him.

He sat on his bed, looking at the bottle. He had said he’d never drink or smoke, since addiction ran in his family. He pondered for a while before giving up, opening the bottle up. He brought the neck of the bottle up to sniff it, making a face. It smelled like rubbing alcohol, and he wagered it probably tasted like it, too.

He hesitated a moment before bringing the bottle to his lip, taking a drink. He made a face, gagging at the burn in his throat. God, that tasted gross, he thought. He let himself recover for a moment before taking another drink, fighting through the pain.

After a while, he was sufficiently drunk, and he was smiling to himself. He understood the appeal now -- the numb feeling he had before was replaced with happiness, and a bit of a giddy feeling. He hated to admit it, but he loved the feeling.

He lay back on his bed, then looked over as the walkie talkie crackled to life. “Sal? Are you up?” Larry’s voice came through. Sal smiled happily, sitting up and grabbing it.

“Sure am, Lar…” he murmured, not aware of how slurred his speech was. A beat of silence came over the walkie, then “Sal, are you… drunk?” Larry’s concerned voice came over.

Sal giggled, “Just a little…” he assured him, “Just wanted to… try it once, ya know?” he asked. “I’m totally fine! Don’t even worry.” he added, hoping that Larry wouldn’t worry.

Larry sighed, “Ok, well… I just know about your dad and the addiction thing. Just wanted to say goodnight, dude.” he said. “Drink some water or something, alright? I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” he said.

Sal smiled, “Night Lar. Talk tomorrow.” he said, putting the walkie back on his dresser as he lay back down. He was glad Larry wasn’t going to yell at him, though he probably wouldn’t have been very receptive to it anyways. He just felt great right now.

Of course, he didn’t realize the spiral this would lead to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I hope my chapters aren't too long, I just have a lot to say :') Hope this is ok!


	4. The Science of Selling Yourself Short

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for:  
> -Alcohol  
> -Abuse  
> -Self-Harm

**_The Science of Selling Yourself Short - Less Than Jake_**  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sal had finally fallen asleep after a while, and the next day he didn’t get a hangover as he expected, but he was thirsty as hell. After he chugged two full glasses of water, he felt better.

The day went on normally, though Larry seemed more worried about Sal. Sal reassured him he was fine, even though he really didn’t feel it. After the water, he felt better physically, but not mentally. He was back to his numb state, with a lot of anxiety sprinkled in. Even Travis could tell something was off, but he didn’t want to push Sal into saying something he didn’t want to.

By the time school was over, Sal was relieved. He hated being at school, even if he wasn’t getting bullied anymore. It just stressed him out like crazy, especially with his anxiety levels being so high. Thank God tomorrow was the weekend.

He made it home quickly, avoiding his dad and making his way to his room and closing the door. He decided to get his homework done first, wanting to get it out of the way. It wasn’t too much, which he was grateful for. He heard his walkie come on, Larry’s face coming through.

“Hey, Sally Face! Did you wanna do something?” he asked. Sal thought for a moment, but sighed. He didn’t mean to push him away, but he didn’t really feel like being around people. He leaned and took it, speaking into it.

“Hey Lar… I’m sorry, I’m doing homework. I um… just feel anxious. Don’t really feel up to… humans.” he explained. He didn’t want to give away too much information, but didn’t want to lie to Larry.

“Oh, that’s fine. I wouldn’t wanna overwhelm you. How about tomorrow? It’s ok if you don’t feel up to it then, either…” he said. Sal could hear the disappointment in his voice, but he felt indifferent to the situation.

“Yeah, I’ll see how I feel, ok?” he replied. Larry hummed, “Don’t forget your medication. See ya tomorrow!” he said, a lighter tone at the end of his message.

“Yeah, tomorrow… night.” he said, setting it back on his dresser when his goodnight was reciprocated. He turned his attention to his homework, finishing it after about an hour. It felt nice to get it done, but he still felt the anxiety crawling up his back, almost like a monster.

He put his stuff away, then glanced over at where he had hid the bottle under his pillow. Two times wouldn’t hurt, right? No one would know, after all… only him. Larry wouldn’t find out, and none of his friends were coming over, so what was the harm?

So once again, he drank until he was feeling the happiness again. He wished he felt this good all the time, but of course he couldn’t. It felt almost like it filled a void in his chest, and he could understand his dad’s love for the bottle, now. Though Sal felt happy, while his father felt angry while drunk. 

He would learn quickly that being happy while drunk wasn’t always the case.

He found himself drinking almost every night, pushing his friends away. He had almost stopped talking to anyone, and missed a lot of school. Even at school, he avoided everyone. He rarely talked anymore, and never answered his walkie talkie or his phone. All his brain was focused on was getting home and getting drunk again. He even stole the other bottle of vodka, not caring about the consequences if it went missing.

He’d fallen into the cycle, even if the alcohol didn’t make him happy anymore. It either numbed his emotions, or intensified them. Sometimes, it DID make him happy, but it was more rare. He’d fallen back into his old habit, cuts and bandages criss-crossed over the old scars on his arms.

After a few weeks of this, he had a particularly bad night -- an argument with his dad about the missing alcohol, which ended with a bloody nose -- he didn’t want to be alone, afraid of what he’d do. He had drank more than usual, and was sufficiently wasted, as he stumbled his way to the elevator, inserting the keycard and going down to the basement.

He made his way to Larry’s apartment, holding onto the walls and whatever else to stay up. He knocked, hoping Lisa wouldn’t answer. He felt relieved when Larry opened, blinking, “Sal? Dude you…” he wrinkled his nose, “Jesus, are you drunk again?” he asked.

Sal shrugged, “Sure am…” he said. Larry sighed, helping him in and shaking his head as he led him to his room. Once inside, Sal stumbled to the bed and sat on the edge, holding his head as his vision swam. Larry stood in front of him, crossing his arms.

“Is this why you ignore us? Why you’re so snippy?” he asked. Sal shrugged, “Guess so…” he mumbled. Larry shook his head, “What happened to never touching the stuff? You even said addiction runs in the family, and yet you still did it?” he said.

Sal frowned, staggering to his feet and turning to face him. “I didn’t mean for it to spiral!” he yelled. “I just wanted to try it out! It made me happy…” he said. Larry shook his head, “Your friends don’t make you happy? How do you think this makes us feel?! You know what, I’ll tell you. Everyone’s so worried, especially Travis. He thinks you hate him! I thought you hated ME!” he yelled.

Sal shook his head, “How do you think I feel?! I don’t do it cause it’s fun! I just…” he paused, “I need it, dude…” he murmured. He always had the itch to scratch, even if he didn’t WANT to drink. He HAD to.

Larry shook his head, “You’re gonna end up like your dad at this rate!” he yelled. Sal felt anger bubble to the surface as he clenched his fists, then shoved Larry back. “Fuck you! I’m nothing like him!” he yelled, tangling his hands in his let down hair, yanking so hard he pulled out some hair.

Larry huffed in frustration, going to him and pulling at his hand, “Stop pulling your hair, Sal.” he snapped. Sal slapped his hands away, shoving him hard again, “Don’t fucking touch me!” he screeched, panic and anger in his voice.

Larry scoffed, “Yep. Just like your dad.” he said. Sal looked at him, “Fuck you! I’m nothing like that asshole! You don’t even KNOW him!” he yelled. Larry crossed his arms, “Don’t I? I know he hurts you, Sal!” he retorted.

Sal stared at him, “And you didn’t… SAY anything?!” he yelled, his anger reignited. Larry shook his head, “I thought I’d wait until YOU told ME! I didn’t want to pry! Even if I asked, you woulda denied it, and you KNOW it!” he retaliated.

Sal shook his head, “How to fuck would you know that if you never tried?! God you have such LITTLE faith in me!” He shook his head, turning to head to the door. Larry leaned, grabbing his wrist, “Dude, don’t go home and do something stupid!” he snapped. 

Sal hissed in pain from one of the newer cuts on his wrist, turning and, without thinking, slapping Larry. “I said not to touch me!” he yelled. Larry made a noise of frustration, turning and shoving Sal to the ground.

“Fine! Then go! Don’t bother coming back, though!” he yelled, turning his back to him. Sal stumbled to his feet, “I wasn’t planning on it!” he yelled back, turning and leaving, slamming the door behind him as he made his way back to the elevator, going back up to his room.

He closed and locked his door, tangling his hands in his hair and yanking. When that didn’t feel like enough, he turned and punched his dresser, hissing and holding his hand. He glared at his phone when it rang, going to it and picking it up.

“What the fuck do you want, Johnson?!” he snapped.

There was silence on the other end, then a quiet response from Travis, “I-I guess now is a bad time, huh?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok this chapter title is long BUT the song is amazing and it's a HIGH recommendation from me! I hope you like this chapter! <3


	5. BITE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for:  
> -Self-Harm

**_BITE - Troye Sivan_**  
\----------------------------

Sal paused at the voice. Travis? Why was he here so late? He realized he had probably been silent for too long and held his head.

“No… I-I mean, well… yes, but you can come up anyways… just be quiet.” he said, hanging up as he tossed his phone on his bed, then went to his door to unlock it, sneaking out quietly, glancing at his dad’s sleeping form in the living room. He was surprised he didn’t wake him when he stormed up earlier.

He opened the front door quietly, waiting by it for Travis. Once he saw him, Travis nodded and quickly made his way inside, then to Sal’s room. Sal closed the front door, then went to his room and closed the door, locking it.

He barely had time to turn around before Travis crushed him in a hug. Sal stumbled, still feeling the effects of the alcohol before blinking and hugging him back. Travis sighed in relief, and it sounded like he was close to tears. “I was so afraid you’d say no… you’ve been avoiding us, a-and I thought that I did something, o-or that you just didn’t want to be our friend, or…” he trailed off, pulling back and looking at Sal, “y-you don’t hate us right? I-I heard you yelling about Larry…” he said quietly.

Sal felt a little overwhelmed, holding his head, “c-can we sit?” he asked, swaying a little. “Lotta stuff to unpack there…” he mumbled. Travis nodded, “yeah, of course!” he said, starting to Sal’s bed and pausing as his foot hit the vodka bottle on the floor. He blinked and kneeled, picking it up and turning to face Sal. Sal avoided his gaze, sitting on the edge of his bed, holding his bruising knuckles with a sigh.

Travis hesitated before sitting beside him, “you’re really struggling… aren’t you?” he asked softly. Sal looked at him, blinking. Why wasn’t he yelling at him? Shouldn’t he be mad? Instead, he was met with another hug, and he felt himself fall apart. He hugged Travis tightly, loud, ugly sobs wracking through his body. Travis didn’t say anything, just rubbed his back in small circles, letting him get it all out.

Sal pulled back, sniffling, “L-Larry and I had a huge f-fucking fight because of me… he never wants to see me again, a-and… I deserve it…” he shook his head. Travis shook his head, “I don’t know what happened, but… it’s obvious that you’re not in the right state of mind…” he said quietly. “He should have realized that… maybe tried to talk to you when you were sober…” he added.

Sal sniffed, wanting desperately to wipe the tears from under his mask. “I didn’t want to be alone tonight…” he admitted quietly, looking down. Travis hummed, “that makes two of us…” he sighed. “Dad kicked me out. I didn’t really want to sleep in my truck again, and… I didn’t really expect you to answer, but I’m so glad you did…” he said with a small smile. “Now neither of us are alone, right?” he asked.

Sal sniffed, smiling a little. “I-I guess not…” he said, looking down. He then glanced up. “Do… you mind if I take off my prosthetic?” he asked. He knew it had taken years to show Larry, but at least if Travis wanted out, he had the opportunity early. Travis blinked, “Oh, no, I don’t mind!” he said, “do you want me to like, face away or something? I-I don’t mind…” he said, rubbing the back of his head.

Sal shook his head, unclasping it and hesitating before slowly lowering it, setting it on his dresser. He took the opportunity to wipe the remaining tears from his cheeks, feeling relieved to be able to breathe freely. He glanced at Travis’s shocked expression, looking away glumly.

“It’s ok if you want to leave now…” he said quietly. Travis shook his head, “N-No! I just…” he blushed and glanced away. “N-Nevermind…” he muttered.

Sal didn’t press, rubbing his knuckles again. Travis glanced over, frowning and gently taking his hand, “did you deck Johnson or something?” he asked with a smirk. Sal huffed out a small laugh, “no… my dresser was the victim…” he said. “Larry only got some pushes and… a slap.” he blushed.

Travis hummed as he looked it over to make sure it wasn’t broken, then frowned as he turned over his arm, “Sal? What are those?” he asked, his voice a bit shaky as he pointed to some of the bandages that poked from under his sleeve.

Sal retracted his arm quickly, tugging the sleeve down, “Nothing. Gizmo scratched me is all.” he said quickly, his eyes averted. Travis obviously didn’t buy it, looking at him sadly, “Sal, please…” he pleaded softly, offering his hand out. That was the one thing Sal didn’t like about having his prosthetic off -- his emotions were readable.

He stayed silent for a while, then finally offered his hand back to him. Travis looked at him, then looked back to his arm, gently pulling the sleeve up, exposing the fresh wounds and scars. Sal averted his eyes, looking away.

Travis’s eyes slid over them, looking at him sadly as he took the other wrist, doing the same to confirm it was on both sides. “Sal…” he said softly, “Sal some of these are bad…” he said quietly. Sal wanted to protest, they didn’t feel bad. They felt pathetic.

“I don’t… think…” he started, but Travis cut him off, “Sal, I’m not kidding. Some of these should have been stitched… I’m not just saying that…” he said, gently laying his hand on top of them. “I’m not going to tell anyone, but you… you really need to find a better way to let things out…” he said.

Sal huffed, pulling his arm back, “you think I haven’t tried? Nothing works…” he said, a tinge of anger in his voice. “It’s more of a last resort thing… I haven’t done it in a long time, but…” he looked down, “I-I guess it got bad again…” he finished quietly.

Travis nodded as he listened, taking his hand. “I know you don’t want to hear this, but… I understand.” he said, pulling back to roll up his shorts, showing the light scarring on top of his thigh. “I never did anything bad, but I understand. It’s a way to cope…” he said, rolling the shorts back down.

Sal looked at the scars, then to him, sighing and leaning forward, hugging him tightly. They had a lot more in common than Sal once thought, and it made him sad. Travis returned the hug, “I don’t want pity or anything like that, just… wanted you to know you’re not alone. You can talk to me, ok? I won’t tell anyone…” he said quietly. Sal nodded, smiling. “Thank you, Travis…” he said softly.

They pulled back, and Sal huffed, “can we do something that isn’t so emotional? I’m tired of emotions now.” he said. Travis chuckled, “Sure, yeah, whatever you wanna do.” he said.

They ended up sitting and talking while Sal doodled in his journal, but something kept bugging him. Travis kept staring at his face. More than he should. Sal knew he should expect staring, but it drove him insane. He almost wanted to put the prosthetic back on.

After there was a lapse in the conversation, Sal could feel his eyes on him again and he sighed and looked at him. “Why do you keep staring?” he asked.

Travis blinked, “Wh-What are you talking about?” he asked obliviously. Sal frowned, “you keep staring at my face. I get it, it’s ugly, but come on…” he sighed.

Travis shook his head quickly, “No! I don’t think you’re ugly! That’s not it at all!” he rambled, “just.. you’re…” he looked away with a deep blush.

“You’re just as pretty… as I thought you’d be is all…” he murmured. Sal stared at him, had he really heard that correctly? Him, pretty? He’d never heard that used before.

“P-Pretty? Are you kidding?” he asked in disbelief. Travis looked at him and shook his head, “I’m dead serious…” he said, biting his lip and scooting forward. “The reason I was so mean to you… I… I had… have… a crush on you, and you know… my dad and all, I thought I could… if I took it out on you, then the crush would go away, but…” he shook his head. “Didn’t happen…”

Sal stared at him, shocked. A small smile made its way to his face, “hey, close your eyes…” he said quietly. Travis looked a bit confused, but did as he was told. Sal didn’t know if it was because he wasn’t sober, or because he had finally gone insane, but he leaned forward, pressing his lips against the other boy’s.

Travis tensed up in surprise, but relaxed, returning the kiss softly. He ran a hand up to Sal’s cheek, cupping it gently as he ran his thumb over the scarred flesh. They parted after a moment and Travis grinned.

“I’ve waited for that for so long…” he said quietly. Sal chuckled softly, “happy early Christmas, then…” he said, then yawned. “I’m not gonna lie, I’m really tired…” he said. Travis nodded in agreement, rubbing his eyes.

Once Sal laid down, Travis bit his lip, “uhh…” he said awkwardly and Sal chuckled, “just lay down, dude. I don’t bite.” he said, turning on his side with a yawn. Travis lit up, kicking off his shoes before gingerly lying down beside Sal, keeping a respectable distance away.

He smiled a little, “night, Sal…” he said quietly. Sal hummed, “night…” he murmured. He was tired, but his mind was racing a bit. He kissed Travis, but he still liked Larry. Larry probably didn’t want anything to do with him anymore, but it still lingered. He still liked him. He… was really starting to like Travis too, though. This was so confusing.

He decided to think about it later, letting himself slip away into dreamless sleep, sleeping through the night easily for once.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh this took way longer than I'd like. I apologize! I'm an EMT student and I literally studied 10 hours straight the other night, plus I just got over being really sick. Hope this is ok ^^


	6. Runaway Train

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for:  
> -Anxiety attacks  
> -Abuse  
> -Self-Harm  
> -Mental breakdown  
> -Alcohol  
> -Suicide

**_Runaway Train - Soul Asylum_**  
\-------------------------------------------

After that night, Travis and Sal were nearly inseparable. The gang didn’t mind, they were just relieved that Sal was talking to them again, laughing again. All but Larry, who opted to sit as far away from Sal as possible. It stung, but Sal figured he should have expected it. Larry and him had fought before, but never like that. It had never gotten physical, and Sal knew it was his fault, but he had been so out of it.

He started to lay off the alcohol since the night with Travis, opting to try and ignore the itch. Of course he slipped up some, but not nearly as bad as he had been doing. Despite Larry somehow avoiding him completely for two weeks, Sal still felt ok. He missed his friend, though. Travis was a delight to be around nowadays though, and Sal could sometimes catch Larry glancing at the two when they would laugh or talk a bit louder. Sal didn’t know why, but the glance was gone as quickly as it had came.

Seeing Larry definitely put a damper on Sal’s mood most days, and it was usually picked back up by Travis, but today he just wasn’t feeling it. Travis could tell, and he simply rubbed Sal’s back when he was at his locker. “Bad day, Blue?” he asked, the nickname falling easily off his tongue nowadays. Sal wouldn’t admit it, but he loved it. Sal didn’t say anything, simply nodded as he put his stuff away, glad that he only had two more periods before he could escape to his house to be miserable alone.

Travis nodded, “I get it…” he said, “hey, if you need to talk or anything after school, don’t hesitate to text me or call me, okay?” he asked with a small smile. Sal nodded, “yeah… thanks Trav. I’ll see you later…” he said with a wave as he turned to head to his next class, a heaviness on his mind as he sat in his chair. While his teacher talked, he couldn’t really hear her. He felt like he was underwater, everything sounded muffled and his vision was clouded with water. Ah, no, those were tears. He blinked them away, then raised his hand to go to the restroom. 

He grabbed his backpack, heading to the bathrooms and going into a stall, setting his bag down and sitting on the floor, his back against the wall. He knew it felt like a long time ago, but something still hurt about what Larry said.

He knew that his dad hurt him, but he never said a word about it. He couldn’t have just… asked? He said that he would have denied it, but Sal himself didn’t know if he would. If it were Larry asking, he would probably tell the truth. That’s what hurt -- he had so much trust in Larry, and it felt like he shattered it, along with whatever shards of friendship they had. Sal clutched his chest, suddenly feeling the weight on his chest again. Oh God, oh no. Not now, please don’t have a stupid panic attack right now.

But his thought quickly diminished as he had to focus on breathing now. He tried to breathe in through his nose, out through his mouth, but it wasn’t working. He yanked his prosthetic off, setting it on his bag so he could get more air in his lungs. It didn’t help much as he slid his hands to his pigtails, yanking them hard as his chest heaved. God, why was this happening now? The only person that he knew that could calm him down was Larry, and he was obviously not going to do anything. Would he?

He fumbled with his backpack, finally getting his phone out after some fight. He went to Larry’s number, sending a quick text.

**Sal: hey laryr? Yo u arou nd?**

The text was messy, but his shaking hands couldn’t do any better than that. He leaned his head back, covering his eyes as tears fell. He definitely wasn’t going to answer. He started to spiral in his thoughts when he heard his phone ding with a new text. He blinked, looking at the phone and picking it up to read the message.

**LarBear: whos this?**

His heart sank. He deleted his number. It felt like a stab in his chest. He didn’t care about him anymore. It was truly over for them, wasn’t it? Logically, he knew it shouldn’t be a huge deal, but it just felt like everything came crashing down. He couldn’t take being at school anymore. He slipped his prosthetic on, grabbing his backpack and rushing out of the bathroom shakily, heading out the doors.

His chest was still tight and he couldn’t breathe as he walked back to the apartments. He took his hair down, tangling his hands in it while he made his way to his apartment, willing himself not to cry anymore. He didn’t want to be a sobbing mess while he couldn’t breathe, he’d let himself cry after he calmed down.

He went to the front door, opening it and stepping in. He turned and immediately almost turned to leave. His father was staring daggers at him, setting down the whiskey bottle that was in his hand.

“Skipping school?” he growled. Sal backed up, clutching his chest, “S-Sick…” he tried to stutter out an explanation, his hand searching frantically for the doorknob. His father narrowed his eyes, starting towards him, “I don’t see a note saying you could leave…” he snapped. Sal whimpered, turning and running towards his room. He nearly made it to the door, but his father grabbed his long hair, yanking him back onto the floor.

It wasn’t the first time that his hair had prevented him from getting away, and he hated it. His mind was buzzing with static, and he could faintly feel the hits from his father. His mind was somewhere else entirely. He finally registered when his father drew back, mumbling under his breath as he went back to watching TV with his whiskey.

Sal slowly stood, feeling the soreness as he went to his room, tossing his backpack down. He was done with this. He was so tired. His dad hated him, his best friend hated him, and he couldn’t even like himself anymore (not that he ever did). Sure, he had Ash and Todd, but he wasn’t close to them like he had been to Larry. He had Travis, but he had to be bogging him down with his bullshit by now. He slipped out of his room to the bathroom, closing and locking the door as he pulled open a drawer, feeling underneath for the blade he had taped there.

He pulled it off, then set his mask onto the counter as he stared at the blade in his hand. He’d been doing better with the addition of Travis in his life, but the stinging in his scalp egged him on. He pressed down on one forearm as hard as he could, swiping up fast. It hurt, but he could barely feel it, watching the blood surface from the deep cut, dripping into the sink. He didn’t spend much time looking at it, switching the blade to his other hand and doing the same to the other side.

He rolled down his sleeves to catch most of the blood, looking at himself in the mirror. God, he was hideous. Travis called him pretty, but he couldn’t see it. He reached a hand up, running it through his hair, then his face crumpled. He felt the tears falling, gripping a portion of his hair. He had come to hate it, seeing as his father only used it against him. Without thinking, he reached up and started swiping at the strands furiously with the blade. He didn’t stop until his hair was a short, choppy mess, hair around his feet and in the sink. He looked again in the mirror, covering his face as he cried.

He had loved his hair, grown it out for so long, but he couldn’t take the fact that it was so easy to use it as a handle to reign him in. He couldn’t tell if he was crying about everything that was happening, or simply mourning the loss of his hair. He looked down at his sweater sleeves, noticing the sticky blood dripping through.

He couldn’t take it anymore. He grabbed his mask and left the bathroom, not bothering to clean it up as he went to his room. He grabbed the half-empty bottle of vodka and his phone, heading out. He could hear his father shouting at him from behind, but he ignored him as he went out to the elevator.

He made his way up to the roof, tossing his mask aside as he sat cross-legged near the edge. He opened the bottle he had, tilting it back and drinking down a good bit of it. It didn’t burn his throat anymore, or he was at least used to it so much it didn’t bother him. He looked over the view, thinking to himself.

He briefly considered running away, but where would he go? The only person that might take him would be Todd, but he didn’t want to go back to the school, and he didn’t want to stay at the apartments anymore. It was too close to his monster of a father. He wished he could just go back to New Jersey without his father, start over, forget this place.

He stretched out on the roof’s surface, closing his eyes. The next time he opened them, he felt dizzy. He looked at his phone and realized he had fallen asleep for about an hour. He groaned and sat up, taking the bottle and drinking down the rest of its contents without thinking much. He let it roll away from him, looking over the town again.

It clicked in his mind -- he didn’t want to be here anymore. He didn’t want to be ANYWHERE anymore. The alcohol wasn’t helping with the bleeding on his arms, and he wasn’t sure if he was dizzy from blood loss or drunkenness.

He grabbed his phone, seeing a few texts from Travis asking if he was ok. A few from Ash and Todd, too, but he chose to text Travis.

**Sal: he y. Ive go t to go.**

It wasn’t long until he got a text back from him.

**Trav: Sal? What does that mean? Don’t do anything rash. Please. Where are you?**

He hummed, looking back at the view, then back to his phone.

**Sal: th e roof. dnt btoher coming. il l be gone bef ore you get he re. than k yo u for being my friend.**

After that, Sal tossed his phone. He could hear the ringtone playing, but he ignored it. He stood shakily, stumbling back a bit and holding his head. He definitely drank too much, but he figured it was his last shebang. Might as well go out drunk and stupid.

He went to the edge, glancing down. He was sure at this height, it’d do the job. He ran his hands through his now short hair, sighing. He thought when he died, it’d be an accident. Here he was though. He took things into his own hands, and it felt… weirdly good. He felt in control of something for the first time in his life.

He closed his eyes, and he couldn’t hear anything anymore. It was just him and his thoughts. He felt clear-headed, leaning forward and feeling the pull of gravity on him.

He didn’t expect to feel the strong arms around his waist that yanked him backwards, his back hitting the cement of the roof, as well as the back of his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the ending is a biiiit abrupt but I didn't want the chapter to go one forever! Thanks everyone for the kudos, bookmarks, and comments <3


	7. Hold On

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for:  
> -Self-Harm

**_Hold On - Chord Overstreet_**  
\----------------------------------------

When his head hit the ground, Sal saw stars in his vision. He groaned as he blinked his eyes open in confusion. One minute, he was feeling such relief, and now he just felt pain in his head and a bit… angry that he had been saved. He sat up slowly to see Larry, breathing hard.

“What the fuck is wrong with you, Sal?! Oh my God…” he held his head, facing away. If he had gotten here a second later, Sal would’ve been gone. Gone forever. He turned when he heard Sal stumble to his feet, his expression softening.

“Sal, your hair..” he started and Sal shook his head, “don’t fucking talk about it…” he muttered, going to fetch his cell phone and mask, nearly falling over. Larry went to him, grabbing his arm so he wouldn’t fall over. He retracted his hand after, looking down at his palm that felt sticky now. He blinked, seeing the bright red blood.

“Sal… Sal, what happened to your arm? Was it your father, or..” he trailed off. Sal shook his head, starting to the door. Larry started after him, “hey! You can’t leave like this didn’t just happen!” he yelled. Sal turned to face him, a mix of anger and sadness on his features. “You don’t care.” he said simply, turning and sliding his mask back on. Larry let out a sigh of frustration.

“Look! Sure, we had a fight or whatever, but God, I didn’t know something like this would happen! Did this happen because of me?” he asked softly. Sal sighed, “no. Not entirely.” he muttered, turning to look at him. “You deleted my number…” he said quietly.

Larry looked away, guilty. “Didn’t think you’d want anything to do with me anymore…” he paused. “Was it you who texted me today? Oh, God I’m so sorry…” he ran a hand through his hair, tears dripping down his cheeks. Sal glanced away, “how’d you know I was here?” he asked.

Larry shook his head, “a frantic phone call from Travis. He’s REALLY freaking out, dude…” he said. He looked at him, “why did you choose to tell him, and.. Not me?” he asked, sounding a little hurt. Sal stared at him, “is that a real question? Larry, we’ve both been ignoring each other, you deleted my number, I… hurt you… who else would I tell except the person that’s been with me through this?” he asked. His tone wasn’t aggressive, just defeated.

Words failed Larry, so he simply stepped forward, wrapping his arms around the smaller boy and pulling him against his chest. Sal was surprised, but it felt like everything hit him at once. All the emotions he was holding in around Larry just collapsed on him. He wrapped his arms around Larry, sobbing ugly, loud cries into his chest. He missed Larry so much, and he had to obviously care for him if he came to save him.

He pulled back after a bit, still hiccuping with the cries as he took his mask off, wiping his eyes frantically, “a-are we friends again? Please say we are…” he whimpered, looking up at him.

Larry simply smiled, ruffling his hair, “how can I say no to those baby blues?” he said. Sal chuckled out a laugh, sniffing and wiping his eyes. Larry patted his back, looking down to find the blood from Sal’s arms on his side. “You uh… what’s going on with this?” he asked, looking at Sal.

At the drop of a hat, Sal looked away, an icy grip on his heart. “Uh… i-it’s nothing. Nothing serious, don’t worry.” he muttered, and Larry shook his head. “Let’s go to my apartment. We can talk there, ok?” he said. Sal felt defeated, but nodded as he trailed after Larry. He looked down at his phone, seeing frantic texts from Travis and 3 missed calls. He sighed, shaking his head.

**Sal: it’s ok trav. im fine now. with larry.**

Despite still being out of it and intoxicated, the whole situation had sobered him up quite a bit. He stepped into the elevator, looking at his phone.

**Trav: Oh thank fucking GOD. Please, tomorrow is Saturday. Can I come over? I need to see you, make sure you’re really ok.**

**Sal: yeah sure, no problem. id say tonight but i think larry’s gonna kidnap me tonight.**

He pocketed his phone after, stepping out of the elevator with Larry as they made their way to his room. He thanked his lucky stars that Lisa wasn’t home as Larry closed the door, sitting them on the bed.

Larry turned to face him, “let’s start with what seems more, uh… pressing. Why are you bleeding?” he asked. “Please don’t lie to me, either…” he added in a softer voice. Sal sighed heavily, looking away. He wanted nothing more than to lie, but if he and Larry were friends again, he could trust him again… right?

He looked at him, “Just… promise you won’t be mad…” he said. Larry looked confused, but nodded. Sal nodded, biting his lip as he pulled his sleeve up, revealing the long, deep, vertical cut that ran from a little below the wrist to nearly the fold of his elbow.

Larry’s eyes widened, taking it in as he held his wrist gently. He could see the scars of varying degrees underneath, and it immediately made him want to burst into tears. Tears wouldn’t help right now, though. It wouldn’t stop the blood from dripping.

He stood, “i-is it on the other arm too?” he asked. Sal didn’t look at him, nodding in shame. Larry turned, going out to the bathroom and coming back with a first aid kit, sitting back down. He examined it again, “I uh… these look like they need stitch--”

“Absolutely not. I’m not going anywhere. Fuck hospitals.” Sal suddenly snapped with such ferocity, Larry thought he had said something incredibly offensive. He pressed his lips together, not wanting to argue with him as he took out the alcohol pads. “This is gonna hurt, lil dude…” he warned. Sal simply nodded, then hissed in pain when he swiped the cut with the pad. “Jesus fuck…” he muttered, but didn’t retract his arm. Larry sighed softly, feeling bad as he swiped it across his other arm, earning another mumble of pain.

Afterwards, he wrapped his arms with the gauze wrap in the kit. Afterwards, he patted it. “There you go..” he said softly, then pulled him into a hug. “You could’ve told me… I wouldn’t have told… I still won’t… I just wish you had come to me…” he nearly whispered, closing his arms.

Sal closed his eyes, sighing. “I know… I didn’t want to tell anyone, though… Travis found out… not on purpose, though…” he shook his head as he pulled back, looking down. “Didn’t want anyone to really know about it so it wasn’t like, attention seeking, ya know?” he sighed, looking away.

Larry nodded in understanding, “that’s ok..” he said softly. “What about your hair? What happened there?” he asked. Sal stayed silent, then ran his through his hair, shaking a bit.

“I was… I was tired of my dad being able to grab it to pull me back… I didn’t think much, I just… did it…” he said, tears welling in his eyes. “I’m so stupid… I hate it now… my hair was the ONE thing i had…” he said, covering his face as he cried softly. Larry watched him carefully, then stood, “I’ll be right back. Putting the kit away.” he said, packing it up and leaving the room.

Sal took the opportunity to lay down, desperately trying not to pick at the bandages. He felt both lighter and heavier, telling Larry everything. It was a relief, not keeping it all in and constantly having to make up excuses and feeling guilty, but now he knew that Larry would be checking him for new injuries. 

He was lost in his thoughts, and he didn’t realize how long Larry was in the bathroom. He looked up when he came back to the room, blinking in shock as he sat up quickly. “L-Larry, your… hair…” he started.

Larry’s hair was cut short, and he was feeling it, humming. “Very weird feeling… I haven’t had short hair, like… ever.” he chuckled. Sal bit his lip hard, “Larry… d-did you do this for me?” he asked quietly. Larry smiled, “of course I did… you seemed so upset, and I just… wanted to help, in my own way I guess…” he said.

Sal stood, smashing into him with a tight hug. Larry played with Sal’s hair, “and for what it’s worth… your hair doesn’t look bad. Like, at all. Can’t say the same for me…” he laughed. Sal sniffed as he smiled a little. Larry always knew what to say.

He pulled back, looking up at him. “Nah… doesn’t look bad. Just… weird. Have to get used to it…” he said. Larry grinned, “and look, now we can grow it out together!” he said, starting to ramble about something, but Sal couldn’t really hear him.

He was just so lucky to have him in his life again. Larry’s confidence, what he did for him… everything. It was making him feel like the emptiness in his chest was getting smaller. 

He really loved Larry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this is good! Thank you for your comments and kudos! <3


	8. Look After  You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for:  
> -Mentions of suicide  
> -Self-Harm

**_Look After You - The Fray_**  
\--------------------------------------

As Sal had predicted, Larry did make him stay the night. After talking for a while, Sal admitted he really didn’t feel up to the heavy, emotional stuff anymore. Larry was ok with this, and they played video games for the majority of the night.

When it came time to sleep, Sal played with the bandages adorning his wrists. “I-I can sleep on the couch or something…” he said. Larry shook his head, “absolutely not. I’m pretty sure you’re not gonna do anything else, but I… I honestly just want you at arm's-reach. It scared me, Sal. It’s not that I don’t trust you, but…” he trailed off.

Sal shook his head, looking down. “I totally get it…” he said, rubbing his eyes as he sat on the edge of the bed. He scooted over so that he could sleep against the wall, lying back with a yawn. He shimmied under the blankets, pulling them over himself, looking at Larry as he kicked his shoes off and did the same, not even bothering with his jeans he was so tired.

He turned to face Sal, sighing softly. “Promise me, please, that you won’t do something like that again…” he pleaded quietly. “I don’t know what I’d do if I had lost you…” he averted his eyes, and Sal could see the tears threatening to fall.

Sal looked down, “I won’t… it was… really stupid, and… I-I’m not going to.” he said. “I-I’m gonna try and lay off the alcohol more, too… I’ve been doing better, but… you know.” he ended, not sure what he was really trying to say. Luckily, it seemed that Larry knew what he meant since he reached and took his hand, squeezing it gently.

“I shouldn’t have blown up at you like I did… I really regret it.” he said softly. Sal shook his head, “I shouldn’t have pushed you… and I really shouldn’t have slapped you…” he felt tears of his own prick at his eyes. “I was… REALLY drunk, and I was just scared and my emotions were everywhere…”

Larry hummed, “it’s ok… it’s all cool now, ok? Don’t worry about it anymore…” he scooted closer, holding Sal close. Sal still worried about it though, he felt like he was an awful person because of it. He sniffed, “Larry how can you say it’s cool? I-I’ve never been violent like, ever. Maybe a punch or two against Travis when he was still a dick, but I… I don’t know, I-I’m just… it’s…” words failed him as he shook his head, trying to scoot away from Larry from the guilt.

Larry didn’t say anything, simply pulled back, using a hand to tilt Sal’s head to look at him then, without hesitation, leaned and pressed his lips against Sal’s gently. Sal blinked, shocked as he stiffened, but then relaxed, closing his eyes and wrapping his arms around Larry. He’d waited for this moment for so, so long. It felt just as wonderful, and as right as he had imagined.

When they finally parted, Larry looked away, embarrassed. “S-Sorry, I just…” he trailed off. Sal’s face split into a grin and he hugged him close, “no… I liked it..” he said softly. It was like the kiss had erased all the anxiety that had built up in his chest. He buried his face into Larry’s chest, sighing softly. For once in his life, he really felt he could have a good night’s rest.

Larry smiled, kissing the top of his head. “Get some rest, ok? You had an awful day…” he murmured. He didn’t want to say that he had, too. Barely making it in time to save his best friend really weighed heavy on him. Just a second too late… he would have been gone forever.

He tried to push the thought out of his mind as he closed his eyes. He could already feel Sal’s slowed breathing beside him and couldn’t help but smile a little. He drifted off as well, hoping Sal felt safe in his arms.

~•••~

The next day, despite Larry’s skepticism on Sal going home, Sal insisted. He told him about Travis meeting up with him, and he knew his father had gone to work by now. He reluctantly let him go, and once he got there, he texted Travis that he could come over whenever.

Going into the bathroom, he sighed heavily when he realized the mess was there. Of course his father wouldn’t bother. He got to work, cleaning everything up. Once he was done, he heard a knock at the door. He let out a sigh, realizing he’d have to explain everything to Travis. It sucked, but he deserved to know -- especially because Sal had texted him first, and Travis helped save his life.

He went to the door, opening it. He was immediately met with a hug so hard that he fell back onto the floor. He blinked, but hugged him back tightly. He could feel tears on his shoulder as Travis tried not to sob. “God, Sal, you’re still here…” he whispered, his voice wavering. Sal hummed, “I am…” he murmured back, and without thinking, kissed his temple.

Travis pulled back, wiping at his eyes. His eyes went to his hair, but he didn’t say anything as he stood, taking Sal’s hand and pulling him up. Sal noted he had a backpack, but didn’t question it much as he closed the front door, leading Travis to his bedroom.

Once inside, Sal sighed and sat on the bed, taking his mask off and setting it aside. Travis looked him over, opening his mouth to speak, but Sal held up a hand.

“Listen… I had a huge breakdown. Larry was ignoring me, deleted my number, and for some reason it set me off. I know, you said I could talk to you. I just… Larry is the only one that can calm my panic attacks… I know I haven’t given you a chance to, but…” he sighed, looking down.

Travis shook his head quickly, “no, I-I get it. You’ve been friends with him for so long. It would make sense. I’m not upset, ok?” he reached and took Sal’s hand, squeezing gently. Sal felt better, squeezing back.

“Mind telling me what happened? It’s ok if you don’t want to share…” Travis said quietly. Sal shook his head, “no… you deserve to know…” he said.

He explained everything to Travis, not leaving out anything. Travis simply listened, his thumb stroking the back of Sal’s hand. Once he was done, Travis sighed, leaning forward and hugging him once again, then pulled back.

“For what it’s worth… I think the hair is cute..” he smiled. Sal ran a hand through it, “is it? I never thought I looked good with short hair…” he murmured. Travis shook his head, “it doesn’t look bad in the slightest… I like it.” he said, ruffling it.

Sal chuckled, pushing his hand away playfully. Travis smiled, then sighed, “can I see them?” he asked. Sal knew what he was referring to without him saying, nodding as he rolled his sleeves up. Travis’s breath hitched at the blood that had gone through the bandages and he took his arm, gently unwrapping them. He winced, sighing, “Sal…” he said softly, then leaned and grabbed his backpack.

Sal watched quizzically, tilting his head in question. Travis looked through the bag, then pulled out various medical supplies, “I, um… anticipated you had done something… so, I brought stuff to clean it up to make sure nothing bad happens…” he said. Sal nodded, “y-yeah, no problem…” he said. In truth, he didn’t want them infected either. That would just cause a whole new world of problems.

He looked at the supplies, “are these all… new?” he asked. Travis nodded, “yeah, I didn’t have all this lying around… I never did anything bad enough to keep this around.” he said. Sal felt himself looking down a bit. He felt a bit flattered -- Travis had gotten all this just to make sure Sal would be okay. Besides Larry, no one’s ever been this caring towards him.

He watched as Travis started to clean him up, his mind spinning. The kiss had been amazing with Larry, and he thought that that had made his mind up that he really liked Larry, but… God, Travis was invading his thoughts too. He was so kind, so caring, so… wonderful. It didn’t feel fair.

After Travis had cleaned both arms, he got a box and opened it, “um… I figured you wouldn’t go to a hospital, and I’d never stitch anything since I’m not versed in that, but..” he held up the box. “Butterfly bandages help more than normal bandages, and steri strips help hold it all together…” he said. Sal nodded, “okay…” he said.

Travis got a few out and opened them, then looked at Sal apologetically, “it might hurt a bit… I have to kinda push the sides together…” he said. Sal waved him off, “Larry doused them in alcohol, can’t be worse than that…” he chuckled a little. It wasn’t very funny, but if he didn’t laugh, he’d cry.

Travis went to work, and while it wasn’t really painful, it did feel weird and uncomfortable. He didn’t say anything, though, watching Travis carefully place the bandages and strips. After he finished, he sat back, reaching and grabbing the gauze roll he had, “almost done, then I’ll leave it all alone.” he said. Sal nodded, watching as he wrapped them, taping it down with the medical tape he had, then patted them gently. 

“Done.” he said, then leaned and opened one of Sal’s dresser drawers, setting the stuff inside. “So you can clean them up and rebandage and everything.” he said, closing it and setting his bag on the floor. Sal tugged his sleeves back down carefully, nodding.

“Thank you… really, thank you…” he said, sighing. He thought for a second, “I… I can’t stay here. I can’t handle it…” he said, massaging his temple as he felt a headache come on. “I can’t stand that stupid man anymore…”

Travis bit his lip, “I… I would offer, but my dad isn’t much better…” he said. Sal shook his head, “I couldn’t ask that of you, anyways… thank you though. I’ll see if Larry, or Todd or someone can take me. Larry would probably say yes…” he chewed his lip in thought. 

Travis smiled a little, “so you guys made up? Thank God… it was so awkward…” he chuckled. “I knew you probably would, since you’ve been friends for so long, but… yeah.” he said. Sal smiled, taking his hand, “it WAS pretty awkward…” he chuckled, shaking his head.

Travis hummed, taking Sal’s hand, “I am really glad that you’re ok…” he said, leaning to kiss his cheek. They both jumped when the door opened, Larry standing in the doorway with a dumbfounded expression on his face. It changed to a stony look as he held out Sal’s phone.

“Uh… you forgot this.” he murmured, not waiting for a response as he turned and left. Sal blinked, then groaned and laid back.

Of course he walked in then. Of course Sal probably fucked this up already. Now everything was MORE complicated than before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, sorry this took so long ^^;; school and stuff, you know how it is! I read a comment, saying one of them should learn to stitch but that takes a while, and wounds can only be stitched within 24 hours, so! Butterfly bandages and steri strips help a lot! Hope this is ok!


End file.
